At 10:00 pm last night, after a wonderful, romantic dinner at an Italian restaurant (and shared bottle of Chianti), my husband gave me my trigger shot. Hopefully it will be my LAST injection–period. I was thanking God that the scary 22 gauge needle that I had dreaded for weeks was actually NOT the needle used for the injection! It turned out that we only had to use that needle for the drawing of liquid when mixing Novarel, and then we switched it with a MUCH smaller needle for the injection. I hardly even felt it!
So far the past few weeks have been drama free, but yesterday I got a taste of the “mind-fuck” effect that this process can have on you. I was pretty tired, anxious and distracted after my early morning monitoring appt. so I figured I would just relax on the couch and wait for the call. At around 1:45p.m., I started getting impatient and left a message on my nurse’s VM, just in case they maybe forgot about me or lost my file or something. My RE Office is obviously closed on Saturday afternoons and the voicemail is only checked until 2:00pm. Like clockwork, I normally get the calls between 11:00am and 1:00pm so by 3:00pm I was losing my shit!! I started crying, convinced that they weren’t going to call and that this whole cycle was going down the tubes. In my just slightly hormonal state, I thought that maybe the Saturday nurse had car trouble and/or spilled coffee on my file or maybe had the stomach flu and just didn’t show up. I was freaking out at the thought of my follicles being neglected, having to go through all of this again and wondering if they would still charge me since it was they’re fault it got fucked up.
Then, as my husband shone a big “I told you so” grin, the phone rang. I had to literally compose myself before answering. The nurse told me that I was “cooked”, with 26 measurable follicles and an E2 count of 3150! Sounds good to me. I just hope this warrants lots and lots of eggs and healthy embryos.
Tomorrow is the big day. It is so surreal, but not in a bad way. My husband and I have been giddy talking about baby stuff, and we haven’t done that since we started TTC almost a year and half ago. As soon as we suspected a problem, all giddiness went out the window. It’s nice to have that feeling back and to be given back the chance to be purely & positively excited. I am so glad we made this decision and haven’t once looked back. I don’t know what this week will bring, but so far the process has been much better than expected. I’m so lucky to have such an amazing support system because without it I don’t know if I would have had the courage to have taken this step.
I know that this wont be easy…… but I’m ready.
Fuck you, “infertility”. I’m ready to prove you wrong.